


Trouble in Paradise

by KaytheJay



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Death Threats, Kidnapping, M/M, Mpreg, Pregnant Aziraphale (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:00:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24236179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaytheJay/pseuds/KaytheJay
Summary: Aziraphale has some news for Crowley. Gabriel is not happy about it.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 82





	Trouble in Paradise

**Author's Note:**

> This didn't go as I expected it to, but it is based off of a number of asks from the top-crowley-central blog on Tumblr mixed with just something I wanted to write. I hope you enjoy it!!!

It was a bright and early Saturday morning. Crowley had just woken up from his nightly sleep and was just thinking of getting ready for the day when he heard a knock at the door.   
“Who could that be?” Crowley asked himself. He certainly wasn’t expecting anyone and it seemed too early for those pesky door-to-door salesmen. He opened the door and smiled. “Aziraphale! What a pleasant surprise.” Crowley said. He leaned against the doorframe and promptly forgot about the fact that he himself wasn’t looking his best. Not that it mattered anyway, this was Aziraphale.   
“Yes, erm, I wasn’t expecting to come and see you today either, but we uh, we need to talk.” Crowley cocked his head. The last time Aziraphale had said that had been years ago, when Crowley had first placed the Antichrist. Crowley knew that there were no major disasters underway, so he couldn’t imagine what the angel wanted. “Can I come in, it’s kind of important.” Crowley stepped out of Aziraphale’s way.   
“Of course, you’re always welcome here,” Crowley said. Aziraphale smiled and looked to the floor as he stepped into Crowley’s apartment.   
“Is there somewhere we can sit?” Aziraphale asked. Crowley noticed for the first time that Aziraphale was paler than usual. Angels don’t get sick, so this was quite alarming.  
“Is everything alright?” Crowley asked. Aziraphale bit his lip.   
“I-I’m not sure,” Aziraphale said. That wasn’t the assuring answer that Crowley had been hoping for.   
“Has something gone wrong? Have you fallen?” Aziraphale shook his head.   
“I’m still one with Heaven,” he assured, though not for much longer, he thought to himself. Crowley led Aziraphale to the other room where he’d gotten a chair just for the sake of Aziraphale. Aziraphale waited for Crowley to sit before sitting down himself.   
“What’s up angel?” Crowley asked. Aziraphale took a deep breath.   
“Strange things have been happening these last few days,” Aziraphale said. “I’ve been feeling quite ill lately. I’ve never felt ill in my entire life, so I phoned Gabriel just to be sure that everything was alright. He said everything was going to the Plan.” Aziraphale shook his head. “But something was off. I knew it.” Aziraphale took another deep breath. “This morning, I uh expelled my breakfast and just knew something was off. But if it wasn’t off with Heaven, it was something with me.” Aziraphale shook his head. “So I did a check on my body and realized that there was something inside of me.”   
“Like a parasite?” Crowley asked, suddenly very confused and concerned. It was one thing for an angel to get sick. It was rare, but it did happen from time to time. To have a parasite would be something completely different. He’d never heard of a parasite that was able to infiltrate an angel’s body and survive the ordeal.   
“Not . . . exactly,” Aziraphale said.   
“Then what is it?” Crowley asked. Aziraphale bit his lip and grabbed Crowley’s hands. He looked down for a moment, sucked in a breath and looked Crowley in the eyes.   
“I’m pregnant, Crowley.” Crowley smiled.   
“Congratulations Aziraphale! This is fantastic news!” Crowley said. Aziraphale furrowed his brows. Crowley was taking this a lot better than he’d been expecting him to. “I can’t wait to meet the little bugger,” Crowley said. He placed a hand on Aziraphale’s stomach. “You loved taking care of Warlock and now you’re going to have a little one of your own.” Crowley hugged Aziraphale. “I am so happy for you.”   
That’s when it hit Aziraphale. Crowley didn’t know. Crowley thought that you just accidentally got pregnant somehow. He didn’t know what the process was. Crowley didn’t realize that the baby was his as well.   
“Crowley,” Aziraphale said, “This baby is as much yours as it is mine.” Crowley snorted.   
“That baby is mine as much as Iris is Newton’s,” Crowley said. “I’ll be by your side if you want me to, but it is your baby.” Aziraphale laughed at the example.   
“You’re right,” Aziraphale said, realizing that there was a lot of explanation that was going to have to go down right now. “This baby is as much yours as Iris is Newton’s. Do you know where babies come from?”   
“Yeah, what kind of stupid question is that?” Crowley said. “A woman gets pregnant and she pushes out a baby. It isn’t that hard of a concept. By the way, how does a woman get pregnant? I’ve always wondered, but all I could find when I Googled it was porn. Now that you’re there, you must be an expert.”   
“Well,” Aziraphale said, unable to believe that he was about to explain the birds and the bees to a 6,000-year-old demon. “There are these things in a woman called eggs. In order for an egg to become fertilized to become a baby, she needs something called sperm. Sperm comes from a man.” Crowley tensed.   
“How? Who did this to you? I will find him and I will-”   
“You did, Crowley,” Aziraphale said.   
“How? I didn’t-” Aziraphale sighed.  
“Yes you did. You didn’t do it on purpose, but you did. A woman gets sperm from a man when the two of them have sex.”  
“Wait so Anathema and Newton-”  
“Yes. And that’s how Iris came about.” Crowley shuddered.   
“I thought that was for leisure,” Crowley said. Aziraphale shrugged.  
“It can be,” he said. “But when a person with a penis and a person with a vagina are involved, you run the risk of, well,” he gestured to his stomach. “Babies get made.”   
“So is that why there’s no more unicorns?”   
“Yes, dear,” Aziraphale said sadly.   
“Oh,” Crowley said, realizing it was his own fault that his favorite animal went extinct. He stayed silent for a few minutes and Aziraphale let him go through his thoughts. This was a lot to think about. Crowley was getting all kinds of new information today and it wasn’t even ten AM just yet. Aziraphale was just going to be ready to answer any questions Crowley had. “So this really happened that one time?” Crowley asked. Aziraphale nodded.   
“You asked what it was like. I went a little far in preparing the body. I didn’t even think about the risk.” Aziraphale shook his head. “I’m so stupid,” He said. “It usually doesn’t happen the first time, but this time it did.”   
“What happens when head office finds out?” Crowley asked. Aziraphale shook his head. He’d been thinking about that all day. He wasn’t sure what exactly would happen. This was a strange situation, surely one that no one else had ever found themselves in. Angels and demons generally didn’t go native and try for the full human experience like Aziraphale and Crowley had over the last few years. But he knew that they wouldn’t be happy. Both of them ran the risk of being heavily punished once their respective head offices found out. He wasn’t sure what more they could do, they had already tried to exterminate them and that hadn’t worked. But he knew that neither Heaven or Hell would sit back and do nothing.   
“I don’t know,” Aziraphale said. “And I don’t want them finding out,” he said.   
“What do we do then?” Crowley asked. “You very well can’t hide out until the baby is born. You still have a job to do.” Crowley thought about how much weight Anathema had gained while she had been pregnant and how utterly useless she had been towards the end (which, of course, Newton had been ok with covering for her). “And there’s the weight, you can’t just hide-”  
“Don’t you think I already know that Crowley!” Aziraphale shook his head. “We can’t do this. I can’t.” Aziraphale put his face in his hands. He mumbled some more, probably more about how this was a mistake, but Crowley didn’t hear it.   
“We’ll figure this out together,” Crowley said. He wrapped his arm around the angel and pulled him towards his chest. “It will be ok.”   
Aziraphale knew the words didn’t mean anything. There was no way that Crowley would know that. He was a demon, not a fortune-teller. The only person who could actually read the future was God, for she had written it. Agnus Nutter had been a strange exception to the rule. Still, he allowed himself to find comfort in it anyway.   
***  
A few months went by and nothing happened. Crowley and Aziraphale dared to relax. They had figured that if they were going to be caught, it would have happened by then. They relaxed enough to eventually announce the news to all of their human friends. None of them understood the consequences of what would happen if Heaven or Hell were to find out about the whole thing.   
Aziraphale continued his assignments where he could. In the beginning, that had ended up being most of them. Ever since the world didn’t end, Aziraphale had been given small tasks. No one in Heaven trusted him with the big jobs after he had stopped the end. But they couldn’t just leave him with nothing. Which left Aziraphale in a good place. On the rare occasion that he couldn’t take care of something for himself for any reason, Crowley was more than happy to take care of it instead. Head office didn’t particularly care how a job got done, just that it got done.   
The bright side of this was it gave both Aziraphale and Crowley plenty of free time to be able to prepare for the arrival. They made up a nursery. Crowley allowed Aziraphale to have it done mostly his way. Aziraphale was, after all, the one who was carrying the baby and therefore should be the one to get to pick, for the most part. Crowley would surprise Aziraphale with gifts, sometimes for himself, but others for the baby. Anathema and Newton also helped them along as much as Crowley would allow them to get involved.   
The first time he felt the baby kick, Aziraphale cried. The baby ended up being quite feisty, keeping Aziraphale up at all hours of the night and occasionally getting a kick in the day. But he was ok with this. That was at least confirmation that the baby had to be ok. Besides, the baby was half-demon. It was going to have something of demonic tendencies. Crowley sometimes wished that there was a way for them to switch off on pregnancy duty so that for once the angel could sleep through the night (which normally wasn’t necessary for demons or angels, but ever since becoming pregnant, it seemed that Aziraphale actually required sleep). Instead, Crowley became fascinated with feeling the baby move whenever he could. Other times, he liked to sit and watch the baby move. It seemed alien, but Aziraphale insisted that humans could sometimes see the baby move in the womb too.   
Everything was going great. That is until Gabriel decided to pay a visit to the bookstore.   
✽✽✽  
“Hello, Aziraphale!” Gabriel called as he entered the building. Crowley cursed. Aziraphale had reached a point that a visit from Gabriel would raise questions. Lots of them. He put a hand on Aziraphale’s stomach.   
“I’ll be ok,” Aziraphale whispered. “Just go.” Crowley shook his head.   
“I’m not leaving you with him.” Aziraphale could hear Gabriel getting closer to the back room, where they usually met when Gabriel sprung a visit on him.   
“Crowley, please,” Aziraphale said. “I’ll take care of it.” Crowley looked Aziraphale in the eyes, nodded and slipped out the back door just in time for Gabriel to walk in.   
“Is that any way to greet an archangel?” Gabriel said. “You may not do much, but you still answer to me.” Gabriel shook his head.   
“Ah, yes, sorry Gabriel,” Aziraphale said. “I was busy with a, erm, customer. I was busy with a customer,” Aziraphale felt the burn of the guilt of lying, but he didn’t let it show.   
“Whatever,” Gabriel said. “I just came to check in on-” his eyes settled on Aziraphale’s stomach. He looked back up to Aziraphale. Aziraphale braced for the coming questions. “Man, you have gotten fat, haven't you?”   
“I suppose I have,” Aziraphale said, putting one hand on his bump. “I hadn’t noticed,” he said.   
“Which is why you should lay off of the human food. You don’t know the effects of food on a celestial body.” Aziraphale was quite aware of the effects, and he was positive that he knew more than Gabriel did. However, Gabriel thinking that his weight gain was due to food would only do him favors.   
“What do you want, Gabriel?” Aziraphale asked. Crowley, in snake form, had snuck back into the room. He didn’t trust Gabriel in the slightest. Much less around his pregnant angel. He wanted to be there when things eventually went wrong. Aziraphale was instantly aware that Crowley had snuck back in, but he didn’t acknowledge him. Gabriel didn’t need to know that Crowley was there.   
“Just to see how you were doing. You and your new life.” Gabriel shrugged. “Isn’t it enough to want to check in on you?” Aziraphale repressed the urge to shake his head and say “not for you it isn’t.” He knew there was another reason. There had to be. Gabriel hated Earth. He would only visit if he wanted or needed something. “And you seem to have gone downhill.” Gabriel lightly punched Aziraphale in the stomach. Aziraphale knew that Crowley was about to strike, so he stepped on his tail to restrain him without letting Gabriel know he was there if he didn’t already know. Gabriel’s face twisted in confusion. “That’s not fat,” he said curiously. Crowley hissed, turning Gabriel’s attention to him. Aziraphale let off Crowley’s tail so he could change back.   
“Lay off, would ya?” Crowley said.   
“Ah, Crowley,” Gabriel said. “Just the demon I wanted to see.” His eyes went back to Aziraphale for a moment, but he quickly refocused on Crowley. “I have a favor to ask you.”   
“I am not going to do anything for you,” Crowley said. He reached for Aziraphale’s hand and squeezed. “I have nothing to gain from you.” Gabriel looked to Crowley’s hand with distaste.   
“Maybe not,” Gabriel said. “But you have everything to lose.” Gabriel shrugged. “Just one call is all it would take to get Aziraphale sent back to Heaven forever.” Crowley opened his mouth as if to say something, but he couldn’t think of anything to say. He knew Gabriel was right. He could also imagine the terrible things that they would do to Aziraphale. He didn’t want his angel to have to deal with that.   
“What do you want?”   
“I need you to do a little temptation for me, will you?” Gabriel asked sweetly, as if he was giving Crowley a choice. A move Crowley himself had invented.   
“What needs done?” Crowley asked. Gabriel shrugged.  
“Nothing too big,” Gabriel said. “Just the Antichrist.”  
“What about him?”   
“He’s too, well, good. The way he’s going he is going to end up in Heaven, and we can’t have that. I just want you to sabotage him. Fill his mind with dirt. Claim his soul for Hell.” Crowley shook his head. Gabriel pulled out a device that Crowley could only assume was Heaven’s version of a phone. “One call,” he reminded him. Crowley sighed.   
“Fine. I’ll do it,” Crowley said through gritted teeth.   
“Good,” Gabriel said. “That’s all I wanted.” He looked over to Aziraphale one more time. Or rather, he looked at Aziraphale’s stomach. “Until next time!” With that, Gabriel disappeared.   
***  
Gabriel couldn’t stop thinking about it. He knew that Aziraphale liked food. It was one of the many qualities that made Gabriel hate him. He’d hoped that it was enough to force him to fall, but God had other plans and wouldn’t let Gabriel fill out the forms. Anyone else and someone as gluttonous as Aziraphale would have been forced to leave Heaven a long time ago. He also knew that sometimes humans got hard when they got fat. It was just usual physics.   
What he didn’t know, however, was why something in Aziraphale had moved. That just wasn’t a thing that happened. Not naturally anyway. But Aziraphale had ignored it as it was normal. Gabriel knew that there was no way that Aziraphale hadn’t felt it too. He had to get to the bottom of it.   
Aziraphale was hiding something, but he wasn’t exactly sure of what.  
***  
“Crowley, he knows. He knows,” Aziraphale said after a few beats of silence.   
“How could he know? He was telling you to lay off food. He just thinks you’re a glutton. A dirty, dirty glutton,” Crowley had dropped his voice and he kissed Aziraphale. Aziraphale shook his head.   
“When he punched it, the baby moved,” Aziraphale said. Crowley shook his head.  
“He didn’t touch it long enough to notice the movement, I’m sure,” Crowley said.   
“But did you see how he looked at it?” Aziraphale shook his head. “He knows, Crowley. He knows.” Crowley had noticed that Gabriel had seen it. He also noticed as Gabriel mentally questioned what it was. What he could say for sure was that Gabriel didn’t know a thing about it. He was an archangel with no experience on Earth. There was no way that he even knew what pregnancy was, let alone how to recognize it. Gabriel could be suspicious all he wanted, but he didn’t actually know the truth. He put a hand over Aziraphale’s bump.   
“Even if on some chance he does know something, I’m not going to let him have you.” This, for some reason, made Aziraphale relax even though he knew that if God got involved there would be nothing Crowley could do. And with a case like this, God would certainly want to get involved. That is just how she worked. Something about the thought of Crowley protecting him made him feel warm inside.   
Over the course of the next few weeks, Aziraphale had been pushed into the same anxiety that he’d felt at the beginning of the pregnancy. Crowley felt the same way, but he tried to keep the angel calm. He’d read somewhere that anxiety could do detrimental things to a baby. Of course, it had been talking about humans, but he figured that it probably wasn’t good on this one either.   
He pushed Aziraphale to sleep most of the time, or at least as much as he could. If Aziraphale was asleep, he wasn’t going to be worried. Aziraphale needed the rest anyway. Crowley insisted that everything was going to be ok, even though he was unable to believe the words himself.   
All the while, Gabriel was hard at work trying to figure out what Aziraphale was hiding. He started at the very start of the time since Armegedon’t. There was years of stuff to go through. And he didn’t want to miss a single one of Aziraphale’s mistakes. He needed proof that Aziraphale was a bit of a fallen angel and deserved to be a fully fallen angel.   
He shut himself in and wouldn’t let anyone know what he was working on. He wanted full credit when Aziraphale’s halo fell. Besides, if you wanted a job done, you had to do it yourself.   
After a month of hearing nothing from Heaven, Aziraphale allowed himself to relax a little bit. Not too much, but just enough that he wasn’t spending his whole life an anxious mess. Right now, that was Crowley’s job, and he was going to allow him to do that.   
Aziraphale began chatting happily to the baby and it warmed Crowley up every time he heard Aziraphale’s soft voice whispering to the baby about how much he loved them and how much he couldn’t wait to meet them. Aziraphale tried various names out on the baby, but never ended up sticking with any of them. Crowley made a few suggestions as well, but neither of them fell in love with the name.   
Before either of them were aware of it, they had come across the final few weeks before the baby would arrive. The pair made all of the final preparations, including finishing up stocking the baby’s wardrobe and other small supplies that Anathema and Newton had recommended to them. They were getting more excited by the day and they hadn’t heard from either Heaven or Hell in a long time. That was fine with them. In fact, it was perfect.   
✽✽✽  
“I need to speak with God,” Gabriel said.   
“I am the Metatron, anything that is said to me is said to God.” Gabriel sighed but decided it wasn’t worth the argument.   
“It is about Aziraphale,” Gabriel said. “I have reason to believe that he is pregnant.” The Metatron didn’t seem surprised by this. “I believe it belongs to the demon Crowley.”   
“Yes, of course,” The Metatron said. “Who else would it belong to?” Gabriel hated that the Metatron was brushing him off.   
“He’s an angel. He can’t just have the baby of a demon.”   
“Times are changing, Gabriel.” The Metatron said before disappearing, having had enough of Gabriel’s constant whining about Aziraphale.   
Most other angels would have dropped it. If God herself didn’t think that it was a big deal, then it wasn’t a big deal. Gabriel, however, wasn’t most other angels. He had tried to exterminate the angel without God’s permission. Why would he need God’s permission now? He didn’t, however, know exactly what he was going to do with the angel. Something had to be done. But they obviously couldn’t kill him. Perhaps he should make true of his threats, even though Crowley, as far as Gabriel knew, had made true of his promise of the Antichrist.   
God didn’t deal with the lowly criminals.   
***  
Crowley always hated leaving Aziraphale at night. However, he had to. There was a party that Adam Young was choosing to miss out on that night. A party that would for sure cause Adam’s soul to go to Hell as Gabriel believed it should. Crowley didn’t want to sentence the kid to an eternity in Hell, but he wanted even less to spend eternity without Aziraphale. Some sacrifices just had to be made.   
Aziraphale was sound asleep. Crowley was afraid to touch him, as not to wake him. It was the first time that Aziraphale had been able to fall into a deep sleep in a long time. A deep sleep that he desperately needed. Crowley whispered his goodbye and blew a kiss to the angel, knowing good and well that Aziraphale would never even realize he’d done it. He just felt bad leaving the angel without at least saying goodbye.   
Crowley, as usual, was successful in his temptation. Mostly. He didn’t try as hard on this one because it was Adam. Adam didn’t deserve what was to come of him. But he was successful enough that Gabriel should be satisfied with the work. Adam was, in fact, going to be destined for Hell. That he knew for sure.   
Crowley quietly slipped back into the bedroom. As soon as he looked over to the bed, he realized that Aziraphale was gone. He didn’t panic at first. He’d assumed that Aziraphale had only gotten up to go to the bathroom, but something in him told him that was wrong.   
“Aziraphale!” Crowley called. When Aziraphale didn’t answer, Crowley became more panicked. “Aziraphale!” Crowley ran back to the bedroom to look for a clue as to where he had gone, but he already knew the answer.   
Gabriel had figured out their secret.   
***  
When Aziraphale woke up, he instantly knew he wasn’t at home. The light was much too bright for their bedroom and his hands were tied together. Something he knew for sure that Crowley would never do without Aziraphale knowing about it first. He brought his hand to his stomach, relieved to find the bump was still there.  
He looked around the room. He knew he had to be in Heaven. But he didn’t know where. He had never seen the room before, though he could tell that it had been designed to host criminals.   
“Hello Aziraphale.” Aziraphale turned to where the voice came from but couldn’t see anything. However, he knew it was Gabriel. “Did you think that you would be able to hide forever?”   
“H-hide? Whatever are you talking about?” Aziraphale asked even though he knew exactly what Gabriel was talking about. Aziraphale instinctively hunched over to try and make it harder for Gabriel to reach the baby.   
“I think you know what I’m talking about.” Gabriel suddenly appeared before him. He forced Aziraphale’s hands away and forced him to sit up. Gabriel cupped Aziraphale’s stomach. Aziraphale tried to smack Gabriel away but Gabriel had done some sort of miracle to keep Aziraphale’s hands suspended above his head. Gabriel smirked. “That demon, he’s given you a child, hasn’t he?” Aziraphale pressed his lips together. He didn’t want to speak. To admit it would give Gabriel ammunition against himself and against Crowley. To openly admit it would put Crowley in danger. If he wasn’t already.   
What had happened while he’d been sleeping?   
“Don’t worry, Aziraphale, Hell doesn’t know,” Gabriel said. “Crowley is fine. For now. We couldn’t find him.” Crowley had left me, Aziraphale thought with alarm, he knew Gabriel was becoming suspicious. He didn’t say anything. There was nothing he could say. Gabriel clearly knew everything he needed to know, and Heaven had collected him for his punishment. Gabriel took a few more steps, the sound of his shoes against the floor made a sound similar to thunder. A tactic he was using to try to intimidate Aziraphale.  
“What do you want from us?” Aziraphale asked. “You already demanded that Crowley force a child, a child, to give up his rightful spot in Heaven. What else do you want?” A pain happened that Aziraphale had never experienced before. Oh good Lord, not here, he silently begged, hoping God would hear his prayer.   
“I want you to not have the baby.”   
“It’s a little bit late for that,” Aziraphale said. Gabriel shrugged.   
“You’re an angel. At any moment you had the power to end this thing’s life. I want you to do that now.” Aziraphale shook his head. Gabriel raised his eyebrows. “No?” Gabriel smiled. “No. Aziraphale, do you know what happens when you tell an archangel no?” Gabriel was about to say something else, but he suddenly looked away from Aziraphale with a shocked look on his face. When he looked back to Aziraphale, he regained his composure. “He’s here.”   
Aziraphale didn’t have to ask. He knew that Gabriel had meant Crowley.   
A few moments later, Crowley appeared in the room, much in the same way that Gabriel had. Gabriel huffed, glared at Aziraphale, and stormed over to Crowley. This room was specifically built to be hidden. There was no way on any planet, in Heaven, or in Hell that a lowly demon-like Crowley had found it all on his own. God herself didn’t even know the room existed. Crowley had no reason to be there.   
“Aziraphale,” He said breathlessly. “I’m so sorry Aziraphale I shouldn’t have-” Gabriel was now standing over Crowley. He had made himself slightly taller as to try and make Crowley afraid of him. It didn’t work. “Hello Gabriel,” he said casually. “Have you heard the news? Exciting, isn’t it?” Crowley tried to walk around Gabriel and get to Aziraphale, but Gabriel blocked his path. Another contraction hit Aziraphale, this one stronger than the last. Crowley looked up at Gabriel. “What have you done to him?”   
“What? Nothing. Not yet,” Gabriel said. Gabriel glared over his shoulder at Aziraphale, who had his eyes closed and was breathing deeply, more focused on the fact that this baby was probably coming, and coming soon, than the fact that he was tied up and was currently Gabriel’s prisoner. “What makes you think I’ve-” Crowley froze Gabriel in place. He had never done this on an angel before and he didn’t know how long it would hold, so he had to work fast when getting Aziraphale out of there.   
“Can you miracle these away?” Crowley asked, unsure if he was going to be able to do it himself. Aziraphale shook his head.   
“The baby’s coming,” Aziraphale whispered. He didn’t know what Gabriel could hear in the state the Crowley’d put him in, but he didn’t want Gabriel to know that fact. Crowley’s eyes widened and he put his hand on Aziraphale’s stomach.   
“Are you sure?”   
“Not positive,” Aziraphale said. He squeezed his eyes shut as another contraction rolled over him. Crowley squeezed his hand. “But I think it’s a pretty good guess.” Crowley nodded. He looked back at Gabriel who, miraculously, was still frozen in place. Crowley closed his eyes and thought about the miracle it would take to get Aziraphale out of the handcuffs. He would be all on his own when the miracles were happening. Bringing life into the world was a miracle on its own, and Aziraphale wouldn’t be able to perform another until after the baby had arrived.   
Suddenly, the cuffs released and Aziraphale tried to stand. When he failed, Crowley helped to pull him up, already feeling the effects of pulling too many miracles at once. Aziraphale stumbled forward a few steps, but Crowley was able to catch him. Aziraphale smiled, but a moment later the smile faltered. Crowley knew that this was happening now and fast.   
He grabbed Aziraphale’s hand and pulled, urging the angel to move as quickly as he could (which wasn’t very fast, as not only was he pregnant, but he was in the early stages of labor). Soon, they were out of the room and rushing down the way that Crowley had come. Rushing as quickly as Aziraphale could. They were nearly there when an angel that Crowley did not recognize stopped them.   
“Demon! What are you doing here?” Crowley quickly placed himself between Aziraphale and this mysterious angel.   
“Hey, it is not my fault Gabriel kidnapped Aziraphale. Someone had to come rescue him.” Crowley heard Aziraphale’s breath hitch. He reached back so that Aziraphale could have Crowley’s hand. Aziraphale squeezed it. “So if you’ll just let us go we’ll be out-”   
“I can’t let you do that,” the angel said. Crowley cursed. It was going to take another miracle to get out of here. Another miracle on an angel.  
“Why not?” Crowley asked. “Do you know who we are?” Crowley crossed the fingers on his free hand hoping that the angel would go with this and he wouldn’t actually have to perform another miracle. The angel looked over Crowley and shook his head.   
“I’m afraid not. I need the two of you to come with me.” Crowley cursed. He didn’t have the advantage of them knowing what had happened to the two of them. Aziraphale squeezed Crowley’s hand so hard it felt as if he had cut the circulation off of Crowley’s fingers. Crowley turned, ignoring the other angel for the moment.   
“Everything is going to be ok,” Crowley whispered to Aziraphale. “Everything is alright.” He placed a kiss on the angel’s head and ran his fingers through Aziraphale’s hair. “It will be over soon.” Aziraphale nodded, refusing to let go of Crowley’s hand. Crowley turned back around to face the other angel, but he had already been frozen in place. Crowley smiled, surprised that he’d even been able to manage it a second time. He turned and pulled Aziraphale the rest of the way down the hallway.   
***  
Once they arrived back at the bookshop, Crowley quickly helped Aziraphale settle on the bed. He shoved away any extra pillows and all of the blankets. He had watched a number of human births, he knew they got messy and was assuming that the same would be for his angel. Aziraphale’s breath hitched as another contraction rolled over him. Crowley was instantly by his side, holding his hand.   
“It’s alright, everything is ok,” Crowley murmured. “You’re doing so good.”   
“Gabriel-”  
“Don’t worry about him right now. I have everything under control,” Crowley said. He knew it was a lie. He also knew that Aziraphale knew it was a lie. Now that Gabriel knew, he would probably stop at nothing to get his hands back on Aziraphale and the baby. Aziraphale ran his hand down his bump.   
“It hurts a lot more than I was expecting it to,” Aziraphale admitted. Crowley felt guilt flood his entire body. He may not have done it on purpose, but it was entirely his fault that Aziraphale was in this mess to begin with. Even if he wasn’t even aware of what he was doing at the time, nor the risk that it would bring. “Oh, dear, don’t worry,” Aziraphale said, noticing Crowley’s face. “Humans do this all the time. I think I can manage it-” he was cut off as another contraction rolled over him.  
“These are coming a lot faster than they normally do at first,” Crowley mused. “I think we need to get at least your pants off of you.” Aziraphale nodded. Crowley gently unbuttoned Aziraphale’s pants and slid them down his legs. He spread Aziraphale’s legs so he could have a look. Sure enough, Aziraphale was already halfway ready. “It won’t be too much longer before you have to start pushing,” Crowley said. He was suddenly grateful for all the births he had been forced to watch under one circumstance or other. He felt he knew at least enough to help his angel out a little bit. Enough that this would turn out to be just fine. Crowley moved back to Aziraphale’s side so he could hold his hand.   
“Good Lord it hurts,” Aziraphale moaned. “And there’s no helping it along to be faster, is there?” Crowley shook his head.   
“No, angel, unfortunately, there isn’t. You have to wait through it until your body is ready to bring the baby about.” Aziraphale gritted his teeth and squeezed Crowley’s hand as another contraction came over him. The urge to push started to build, but he shoved it away. It wasn’t time just yet.   
“The baby seems quite settled where they are,” Aziraphale said.   
“Well of course they would be,” Crowley said. “It is where they have been for their entire life. No one would like to be forced out of the place they’ve spent their entire life in. Probably why this whole situation has to be painful.”  
“I believe that had to do more with Eve than that,” Aziraphale said. Crowley rolled his eyes.  
“Don’t go all religious on me,” Crowley teased. Aziraphale shook his head.   
“ ‘m not. Just-” This time Aziraphale couldn’t force back the urge to push. Crowley quickly moved down as soon as Aziraphale had finished, so he could make sure Aziraphale was ready for that, so he didn’t hurt himself more than he already had to. He smiled.   
“You’re right, darling, it’s time,” Crowley said. “Now let’s make this snappy so you can be done with this whole business.” He went back so Aziraphale could hold his hand. As much as he would love to watch the second his baby was born, he knew Aziraphale needed his hand more than he needed to watch out for that.   
A few hours later and they were still at it. Aziraphale was clearly getting worn and Crowley couldn’t blame him. Bringing a baby to life had to be exhausting all on its own, but to also have to bring it into the world? It hardly seemed fair. He felt that the father should have to do something more than simply hold the hand of his laboring partner while they did all of the heavy work. And all the pain that Aziraphale seemed to be in. He never wanted Aziraphale to go through anything like this ever again. It didn’t seem to be worth it.   
“I can’t do it anymore,” Aziraphale panted. “It’s too hard. I need a rest.” Crowley ducked down to have a look at how things were going. He still, much to his surprise, couldn’t see the head. Crowley sighed.   
“I know, love,” Crowley said. “I know.” He pressed Aziraphale’s knuckles to his lips and kissed them. “But you’re doing so well. You have to be getting close, I just know it. Is there anything you need? Anything at all?”   
“Get the baby out,” Aziraphale grunted. “Then we’ll talk.”   
“Well, you’re going to have to push then, aren’t you?” Crowley said. “You’re not going to be able to give up.” Aziraphale squeezed Crowley’s hand as he pushed through the next one. “That’s it. You’re doing well. You’re doing so well,” Crowley said. He ran his fingers through Aziraphale’s sweat-dampened hair. He kissed Aziraphale’s forehead. “I’m so proud of you.”  
“I felt them move quite a lot that time,” Aziraphale said.   
“That’s good,” Crowley said. “We need a lot of movement if this is going to end any time soon.” Crowley moved to see if he could actually see any of this progress yet. Still nothing. “Do that again. Get them out of there,” Crowley said. “It is going so well.” Aziraphale nodded before starting to push again. Crowley smiled. “That’s a good angel.” Crowley decided to stay right where he was. Aziraphale was doing so well, but he needed to keep an eye on the progress. This had been going on for far too long. It shouldn’t have taken nearly this long for the little one to arrive. Unless this was some cruel punishment from God that was making it take so long. Crowley promptly decided that it wouldn’t surprise him if it were.   
“You’re crowning!” Crowley said after a few more pushes.   
“What’s that mean?” Aziraphale panted.   
“I can see their head. You’re so close. Everything you’ve been working so hard for. It’s almost over.” Crowley put his hand on one of Aziraphale’s thighs to keep it held open. “You’re almost there. One more and I think we’ll-” Crowley cut himself off as Aziraphale pushed one last time and the baby came free. He smiled and scooped her up, cleaning her mouth and nose out before cutting her cord. “Look at that,” Crowley said. “She’s here.” Crowley put the baby on Aziraphale’s chest for a minute. “I suppose I should probably go clean her up then, haven’t I? Blood isn’t a good look on anyone.”   
***  
“Just look at her, Aziraphale!” Crowley said. He’d just gotten back from cleaning her up and handed their newborn daughter to Aziraphale. “She’s perfect.” Aziraphale smiled as the tears began pouring down his face. She was, after all, the best thing Aziraphale could have hoped for. Nothing else mattered anymore, just him and his daughter. Crowley looked at the mess that had been made trying to get her out of Aziraphale and sighed. Normally he would just miracle it away, but he didn’t have it in him. He’d performed the two biggest miracles he had ever done and been there the whole time Aziraphale was performing his miracle, providing strength as he could.   
“She’s got your eyes,” Aziraphale whispered. He looked up to Crowley and Crowley placed a hand on their daughter’s back. He gently rubbed it and smiled. She was finally here. They’d been waiting for her for so long, and she was here. Within a few minutes, Aziraphale fell asleep. Crowley smiled and scooped the baby up. She, too, had fallen asleep. He cooed at her anyway, careful to stay quiet enough that neither Aziraphale or their new baby would wake.   
Now that she was here, there was going to be a whole new set of challenges when it came to her. Gabriel already knew about her and would surely tell Beelzebub as soon as he got the chance.   
But at that moment, it didn’t matter. All that mattered was getting some well-deserved rest.

**Author's Note:**

> Hits and kudos mean the world to me. Comments fuel me into next week.  
> Find me on Tumblr @justanangelandhisdemon


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